Lunch Lady: Hot For Teacher

I know your shoes are probably soaked and you almost dropped your phone in a puddle and maybe your $3 bodega umbrella turned inside out AND it's a Monday... but don't worry because I'm about to give you some really good news. Recently, Charlotte, our resident cocktail connoisseur and I had a little lunch date at one of our go-to spots in the neighborhood- The Meatball Shop. Since we were already celebrating lunch time and the end of winter we decided to have a couple cocktails and make some friends. Well, one thing led to another and some secrets started to slip…

Just kidding- I'm insanely nosy and asked a million questions, but either way it turns out that all of the bread they use is from Il Forno Bakery! Right across the Bronx River from where I was born near Castle Hill. Now, I have always always been told that the best bread comes from the Bronx (they say it's something about the water) and while the people sharing this information may be a little biased, I swear once you have some you will totally agree. After hearing this we decided to order some sliders (because sipping Vodka at 12pm can definitely get a little hairy) and found out that all of the beef is also locally sourced from small farms in Pennsylvania.

So much positive information in such a short amount of time- by the end of the meal our casual lunch date had turned into a crash course in ethical eating. How funny to think I've been coming here for years and had no idea they were so environmentally conscious. Pretty fucking rad.

So, here's to good food, great dates and truly amazing neighbors. Cue in our babe Charlotte to tell you more about the much appreciated Moscow Mules they whipped up for us ;-)

<3 Ash

p.s. If sustainable development and responsibly sourced meats are topics that tickle your fancy, The Meatball Shop is currently in the business of slinging books as well as sliders. They've got an entire chapter in The Carnivore's Manifesto and have even partnered up with Heritage Foods USA to get their pork from farmers who vow against growth hormones AND practice fair labor. Just sayin…

P.P.S! Whatever meatballs you get, try them with pesto- it's my favorite.

Matchmaker, matchmaker, I’ve found my match - the Lunch Lady and the Saucer, together forever, in food and drink matrimony. A 1940’s cocktail seemed fitting to celebrate, and Moscow Mules in copper mugs ensued. The reason for the mug is this: copper conducts temperature really well, keeping your drink extra cold (~metal geek knowledge~) and the handle keeps your warm paws away. Here’s how The Meatball Shop does theirs:

11⁄2 oz Brooklyn Republic vodka
1⁄4 oz lime juice
3 oz Regatta ginger beer

Combine vodka and lime juice in copper mug, add ice and top with ginger beer. Squeeze with lime wedge and serve.

Cheers,

Charlotte

Lunch Lady: How you doin?

Guess what! Today is St. Joseph's Day! The name or feast day of San Giuseppe, the sorta-father of the most famous surprise baby in history. Legend has it that he saved Sicily from famine using the magical fava bean and now every March 19th people get together and eat the foods and wines and things.

Also, this holiday is vegetarian friendly because, technically, you're not supposed to eat meat. I will most likely eat a burger or something but WHTVR. "To each his own" or "sauzeech calzone," as my sister likes to joke.

Now onto the good stuff... you can also celebrate this holy day by getting a special zeppole!  There are a few different kinds, but the only ones you need to worry about are these two…

They are delicious. They look like boobs. And they're as big as falafel sandwiches. So even if you're not religious, even if your family doesn't talk with their hands- just grab your favorite Joe,  JoAnn or Josephine and stuff your faces with cannoli cream, custard, cherries, pastry & powdered sugar.

Plus, he was a carpenter and since I know yous guys are all obsessed with woodworkers, grab one of these treats for them as a 'thank you' for being so babely and useful.

I got my pretty ladies at Fortunato Brothers on Manhattan just off the Graham L stop. Definitely one of the best Italian bakeries around. They were $3.75 a pop and absolutely worth it. And good news! They stocked up this morning so I think you should be able to grab one or ten if you really haul ass.

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: R.I.P.

Here's the original recipe I got and then I basically screwed the whole thing up and did whatever I wanted. Enjoy!!

SPICY GINGERBREAD COFFINS

COOKIE DOUGH

3/4 cup powdered (confectioners) sugar

1/4 cup soymilk

1/4 molasses and Mike's Hot Honey mixed

(I used about 1 part molasses to 2 parts honey)

1/2 tsp ground ginger

1/2 tsp fresh ground nutmeg

Some cinnamon

Some ground cloves

I wasn't really paying attention because I was watching the Walking Dead and drinking the Guinness Extra Stout that I had initially planned on throwing in here. 

I guess you could say it's a "pinch" of each even though that sounds a little prissy

2 tbsp cocoa powder

2 tsp Aztec Chocolate Bitters

Bought this at Whisk down the block. It tastes really amazing even on it's own. Although, I can't really tell if this adds anything to the flavor of the cookies because I've been taste-testing these cookies for like 8 hours straight. For my own sanity I'm going to say that it does

2 cups whole wheat flour

1/2 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp baking powder

1/2 salt

ROYAL ICING

even MORE powdered sugar

some soymilk

some corn syrup.

I made this at my desk and did not measure any of it, sooooo... godspeed.

Just make sure it is the consistency of icing and that it is sickeningly sweet

INSTRUCTIONS

Whisk together oil and sugar in a large bowl

Add molasses, honey and soy milk

(also don't be alarmed if you've never used molasses before- it smells horrible and looks like motor oil and reminds me of that movie Critters for some reason. But it doesn't taste horrible. So, don't worry)

You're supposed to sift in the dry ingredients while mixing the dough, but I had no patience so I threw it all in at once and mixed it with an electric beater and it was perfectly fine. The dough is going to be stiff and kind of like Playdough when it's done.

Wrap it in plastic wrap. Refrigerate for about an hour. Relax. Do some dishes. After that roll the dough out onto a lightly floured surface. It should be almost 1/4 of an inch thick. Make some cookies.

Preheat oven to 350. Bake for about 8 minutes or so. They look awful when they're burned so keep an eye out.  

Wait til they're cool. Ice them. Eat them. Bring some to your coworkers and your poor friend who has to bartend on Halloween and watch a million Miley Bears stick their tongues out and puke all over the place. 

ALSO, check out these Catbird babes all dressed up as the Spice Girls for Halloween!

I can't even.

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: Because Why Not?

So, as you already know, us Catbirdettes spent last night guzzling Salty Dogs and Bulleit Bourbon like it was our job. Which, I mean, it kind of absolutely was. And because of the free-flowing liquor and endless brain-splitting laughter we are pretty much all hungover. My poor body is moving at a glacial pace and I just saw a video of a cute old man that nearly made me sob. Ugh, such a loser. Anyway! I was trying to decide what my fifth beverage of the morning was going to be (the first four being whatever kind of Iced Tea I could find within five blocks) and then the gods blessed my life with this little gem...

Are you kidding me?! Like I could ever come up with a better reason to stop being lazy and bring back the Lunch Lady posts. People are obsessed with Sriracha for a reason. Because it's amazing and it makes everything better. Like when you feel like crap and put on your favorite lipstick or you have to transfer three times to get to work because the stupid L is down but you miraculously make every train right on time AND there's a seat next to someone cute/ an old lady reading some soft core prairie porn. It does not get better this and I am TOTALLY fine with that. 

The genius coffee shop slinging this deliciousness is Bedford Baking Studio right between South 3rd and Fourth, otherwise known as Portlandia by everyone at Catbird because it is so unbelievably cute and kitschy.  Just look for yourself in this pic MER snapped that shows off their expert craftiness.

And here it is in all it's humble* glory paired with a really amazing croissant sandwich made with olive tapenade, fresh tomato & mozzarella and some kind of green I forget what.

It looks like a regular latte, tastes like a mocha mexican hot chocolate, which is probably a thing somewhere, and for atleast 20 minutes my synapses were firing all over the place and I came up with some really good ideas for some really important things. Syke- I thought about my lifelong crush, where I put my 2nd favorite pen and what to listen to next. But I was really enthusiastic. And that's always a treat on an otherwise ordinary afternoon.

<3 Ash

*thanks to Leigh for helping me find a word better than unassuming because my brain went back to being broken

p.s. who has a fantasy football league I can join? I will absolutely ruin it for everyone involved, hope that's cool.

Lunch Lady: GOING PLACES!

My trip to Tulum, Mexico with a couple of very good friends. Here's what had happened and here's what I ate.

Welcome to AeroMexico! Our flight left at 7am so they gave us breakfast. Here you see a tiny omelet, some bread that no one ate,  5 tater tots, some tomato juice (that was later paired with vodka because it was free and I am not a very good flier) and the world's hottest coffee ever. The coffee was actually very good but we hit turbulence and then it was just a plane full of people desperately trying to lap up their scalding hot beverages before they got a chance to spill all over the place. My friend Brittany was wearing white jeans and I was very nervous for her.

We stayed in a bungalow on the beach and ate this ^ every morning at the hotel's restaurant. And it was FREE. I forget what name they gave it but it was Huevos Rancheros with scrambled eggs instead of fried. It also came with guacamole, black beans, tomato, cucumber, orange juice, coffee, one million corn tortillas, and (of course) some delicious tropical fruit that I am unfortunately allergic to :'(

While we were there I took every opportunity to beef up my spanish. I was pretty relentless and eventually even the waitress made fun of me saying that breakfast time had become a spanish class because of all my questions about the menu. It was hands down the best food I've ever had. 

Coming back home to make my own breakfast sucked. It really really sucked. Hard boiled eggs and Melba Toast? I nearly cried.

p.s. Mantequilla is butter. Who knew.

The place where we stayed was within walking distance to the Mayan Ruins. Now, when I say "within walking distance" I mean it was crazy crazy hot, everyone's directions were "walk down the beach and then make a left and then you can get there" and we wished we had bikes. But as luck should have it we were in Mexico so any kind of complaining was just ridiculous and strongly frowned upon. 

 It was so incredibly beautiful. I snuck into a tour group for a couple of minutes to learn some stuff about sacrificing people or whatever but it was soooo busy! We even made sure to go right when it opened but it was still overrun. Either way it was very interesting and I would like to go again with a personal guide.

I imagine it to be something very special without all that clutter <3

Here is Coqui Coqui! It's a perfumery in Tulum that is also a Hotel and an amazing amazing restaurant. Photographed here is the burger I had and part of my thumb. I got a burger because whatever, I don't know. It was probably a bad idea anyway because no one knew what "rare" meant and the only word I could think of to describe what I wanted in spanish was "sangre" and that is just a creepy thing to run around saying to people when you're talking about dinner. 

For example:

Me- "can I have it rare?"

Waiter- "I don't know what is rare"

Me- "bloody"

Waiter- "I'm sorry"

Me- "Sangre" *Blood

Turns out I can make people uncomfortable all over the world.

I also drank Tequila and lime. It was fantastic and I had a ton of it.

Anyway, my friends got amazing salads with fresh seafood and the most ripe avocados the earth has ever seen. Scott also got a carafe of Sangria that was full of fresh fruit and could've lasted a fortnight for someone who wasn't on vacation. 

On my last day I got on a plane and ate this. A "turkey" and cheese sandwich with some kind of  coffee flavored flan-ish dessert, another makeshift bloody mary, and a pretty decent tiny salad. We watched Jack Reacher which was almost as bad as Gigli and then they turned off the movie like 30 minutes before it ended! So now I have to see it all over again to figure out how Tom Cruise gets the girl back from the fingerless Siberian psycho.

That was my trip.

I hope you enjoyed it

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: Alright Already!

I am so over this. 

I don't want snow or hats or coats or boots or cold kitchen floors anymore. I want sun and good music and good friends and fun and long long days on rooftops with ice cold beer.

I also want good food! The kind of food that reminds you that right now someone somewhere is getting tan on a beach with the bluest water you've ever seen. And maybe in a week or two it could be your turn... Don't forget to send me a postcard!

But yes back to the food. Delicious food. Here's where Cafe Mogador comes in- They have THE most amazing Mediterranean food I've ever had in Williamsburg. It's so incredibly perfect. And their backyard is amazing! 

I snagged this picture my friend Linda took so you can see what I'm talking about. I wish my living room looked like this but every time I try to keep a plant the poor thing bites the dust in a week or two. C'est la vie. 

I went one unseasonably sunny afternoon and had the Hummus Platter and Vegetarian Cous Cous. I might get it again for lunch today because I'm reminding myself how insanely delicious it was. They put raisins on top of my food. Raisins. And it was amazing. 

Also the coffee is good and it's just a nice beautiful place to sit and relax and chat with a friend. Or maybe a date. Or brunch! I went for brunch once and it was nice even though I was really in no shape to enjoy anything. Yeah, I want to go back there. Happy Spring, everyone!

<3 Ash

p.s. Here's this amazing song that reminds me of warmer weather ;-)

You're welcome.

Lunch Lady: Sooie!

Oh haaayyy Kitty-Babes! So, Rony totally lit a fire under my ass for being the most neglectful Lunch Lady ever! And thankfully I have the perfect place in mind to start this romance up again...

Since we've got a new studio on the South Side I've been walking past a bunch of awesome places I've never seen before and one of them is Brisket Town! It's pretty great. And when I just told my dad about it the first thing he said was "Shit, I wanna live there." Which is basically how I feel whenever I make a trip over for one of their delicious Brisket Breakfast Tacos. It has pickled onions, brisket, cilantro, egg, some kind of bbq sauce (I think) and it's on a flour tortilla. I personally wish they could toast the tortilla a little but either way it's phenomenal. 

They're on Bedford and South 5th and you should all start joining me for breakfast there- which is normally my least favorite meal of the day but since I've found a way to incorporate Brisket into my morning schedule it's really upped my quality of life. Emotionally anyway ;-) So... yeah they serve Breakfast Tacos from 9am to 12pm and they have Blue Bottle Coffee and Orange Juice and a really nice waitstaff. It looks kind of like a barn inside and they always play awesome music as well. I'm even convincing the vegetarian Catbirds to give it a shot because, well it's just a good place. And they have veggie tacos that sound really delicious. Those have roasted brussel sprouts, eggs, cheese, potato hash, caramelized onions, peppers, cabbage slaw and homemade ketchup! :-) And I don't know where else you can get breakfast tacos around here, so they definitely filled an enormous void. As far as myself and a few other Birdettes are concerned anyway.

<3 Ash

p.s.

Here is a video for your viewing pleasure... Only Dale Hawkins can make calling your love interest a Little Pig sound even remotely cute.

Lunch Lady: Girl Crush

<3 <3 <3

So by this point it's pretty obvious that our obsession with Dina's taco truck (La Troca Del Sabor on N4th btwn Bedford and Berry) has gotten a liiiiiittle out of hand. At first it was maybe just a few of us waiting in line once or twice a week and now it's come to the point where if you even mention the word taco you will have a lunch list as long as Melissa's arm within seconds. Veggie Burrito- no rice, Pork Burrito- no cheese & extra sour cream, 2 Veggie Tacos- no peppers, Chicken Taco- extra onion & no cilantro, a million Coca Cola Classics, extra hot sauce, extra cream, etcetera etcetera. I have to say the orders get pretty wild sometimes and she never messes up.

Soooo Lizzie came up with the awesome idea of giving her a Christmas gift! Actually she's been talking about giving Dina a gift since like July or something, that's how far the obsession goes. So all of us Catbirdettes decided a cute pair of our SS Heart Studs were the perfect way to go. And as you can see she was beyond thrilled!!

So here's to Catbird's Woman Of The Year- Dina <3

We love you. Unconditionally. Forever and Ever. Until the end of time.

XoXo

<3 Ash, Rony, Leigh, Lizzie, Steph N, Steph G, Melissa, Lauren, Jules, Ilana, Elana, Courtnay, Anna, Emmy, Allison, Correy, Candice, Claire, RayRay, Rachel, Rosie, Meaghan, Maddy, Laila, Carolyn,  Maureen, Kristina, Joey, Julia, Liz & Genne!

Lunch Lady: Personal Space

I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS. I will totally look through your bathroom cabinets every time I'm in there. If you are on your phone- I am asking who you're talking to. If you order a drink- I am taking a sip. It's bad, I know! I try so hard and sometimes I just have to save my friends the stress and eat alone.

Since constantly harassing the people I love can be pretty tiring, when I went to Cafe Colette for a little solo lunch I definitely enjoyed myself. I had the poached salmon salad...or maybe it was tuna, some fries and a much needed coffee. The salad had pickled veggies, potatos and some fried capers on top which were really delicious and kind of took the place of crutons except they were much saltier. And the french fries were amazing as always :-)

Sitting on their little patio and people watching was very relaxing. The staff is really nice too and pretty laid back. I'd have to say the only downside to my date was making eye contact with a stranger while I spilled coffee all over the table. Other than that it was much needed and something I'd recommend everyone do before the holidays hit and we're all forced to move at warp speed.

Oh and then there's this gem that I haven't seen until just now for some reason. Enjoy!

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: The Rockaways

So to all of you in NY and elsewhere who got into it with Sandy this week, we wish you well and hope that you are getting all of the help that you need. And for those of you, like myself who went by pretty unscathed except for the massive amounts of empty calories you probably consumed out of boredom- I hope that you have the time and means to help your less fortunate neighbors.

The Rockaways got hit pretty hard this week and they need all of the help they can get. So, this time instead of spending my boss' dough chowing down on french fries I took my business to the supermarket to snatch up as many non-perishables and canned goods my shoulders could carry. I also wrestled up a fellow Catbirdette, Steph who was really handy when it came to keeping vegetarians in mind because pretty much everything I picked up whether it was soup or pasta sauce had something like "Now with 20% more meat!" slapped on the label.

Seriously weighed down by two Ikea bags and backpacks full of food we headed to The Brooklyn Kitchen at 100 Frost St. where they are currently accepting donations of clothing, cleaning supplies, canned goods, paper plates, cups, gasoline, water etc. and they could really use your help. If not with supplies then possibly with sorting. There's a ton of stuff in that back room that needs to be properly allocated. And being that there were over 100 homes in Breezy Point ruined from the storm I'd say anything you can give would be amazing. 

There was even a lovely couple ahead of us who brought an impressive amount of alcohol, although I'm really not sure the fine people at The Meat Hook and Brooklyn Kitchen condone that. You'd have to ask them ;-)

Thanks to Rony for the funds and support, Steph for her freakishly strong shoulders, and The Brooklyn Kitchen for spearheading an awesome way to give back. I for one definitely squander enough man-hours boozing and gallivanting so it was nice to use a little of that time to actually help someone in need.

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: Alright Alright Alright!

Even the Cookie Monster is eating vegetables - so I guess I'm going to have to bite the bullet and stop having French Fries with every meal. Consider this my Day 1 of trying to eat like a semi-adult, kind of.

I absolutely had leftover mac n' cheese for breakfast BUT for lunch I did a 180 and downed the most amazing smoothie I've ever had in my entire life. For Real. It's the #11 at a magical little place called Tiny Empire and I think they are my favorite new neighbors <3

The smoothie I ordered is made of this stuff --> Kale, Coconut Water, Coconut Meat, Spirulina, Raw Cacao & Dates. It tasted like I was eating a salad and drinking a milkshake at the same time- something I just realized I'm very into. Their Kale Chips I purchased and tried to share were pretty amazing but I kind of ate them all in a heartbeat so they missed out on picture day. Also- alongside they're pre-made juices are containers of Blue Bottle Coffee so you can be healthy and hopped up aaaaall at the same time.

in conclusion-

Dear Tiny Empire,

Thanks for the wake-up call

 ;-*

AAAAAND

While we're on the subject of letting mother nature take the lead- a few of our Honorary Catbirdettes (and the hottest sister babes you'll ever lay your little eyes on) decided to impress the shit out of everyone and open up a Raw Juice Company of their own. The DROUGHT storefront is located in Plymouth, MI- a little suburb of Detroit and filled to the brim with delicious stuff to battle your bad habits. You can order their raw cold-pressed juice via their website for delivery within the Metro-Detroit area or swing by during store hours.

So if you find yourself in Motor City, go see our best ladies juicing in their Twisted Stackers and First Knuckle Rings! 

P.S. James Sisters, if you're reading this- NY can't wait to take you in its lovin' arms.

<3 Ash

Bonus. Because I feel like it.

Lunch Lady: Egg on your plate

So I caved and went to Egg. Everyone I work with is always telling me how fantastic this place is but I've been staying away because... well I really just don't like eggs that much. They're very weird. And pretty much the only thing besides cupcakes (don't even ask me why) that I never seem to make properly. Anyway I went and it was actually a really great idea because their food is amazing. I hear their coffee is too but I already had two cups this morning and I wasn't going to push my luck.

I ordered the Duck Hash with hard boiled eggs and LOOK at the cute tiny cups they came in. I had a friend in college whose grandmother gave her a really fancy set of these for her new apartment and like any responsible 18 year olds we just used them to take shots of Rumplemintz or something equally embarrassing. Anyway the cups are really cute but kind of useless actually. I still burned my fingers peeling the eggs :-( The Duck Hash was soooo good though. And Lizzie basically made me promise to have the Candied Bacon which was also a veryvery good idea. Cheese Grits- awesome. Biscuit- amazing. Fig Jam- my favorite favorite favorite part. It's really hard for me to find jams that I like because I'm not that into sweet fruit but it turns out Fig is the way to go.

ALSO they give you Crayola Crayons to use on your tablepaper. I don't like other crayon brands usually because they are too waxy. And I remember even when I was little I thought it was really something special that Crayola goes the extra mile to make the paper almost the exact same color as the crayon itself. So, it was nice of Egg to shell out some dough for the good stuff. They probably knew it would make my day.

THEREFORE! hooray for breakfast. And things that remind me of a time where I didn't have to pay rent or tie my own little shoes.

Today is a good one :-)

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: Say What??!

So my first time ever actually going to an Indian restaurant was just this Sunday. I went to a tiny spot called Bombay Kitchen right off the Halsey stop and it was so amazing that I have been craving Indian food ever since. Then I realized that we had just gotten a new menu from this place Bay Leaf right around the corner so I decided to try it. I had absolutely no idea what I was ordering (when I went to the restaurant in Bushwick I just got whatever my friend told me to order) so it was pretty much a shot in the dark.                                               

I went with the Lamb Pasanda and Vegetable Aloo Gori- I had to google both of these things before ordering and I have to say I did a pretty good job with my internet research because they were both insanely delicious and getting to try food that I've never had before was actually pretty fun.

My order came with a huge piece of Nan bread that I proceeded to bite two large holes into to make a mask for the amusement of my co-workers (I'd post the picture but it is actually terrifying), Basmati rice, some kind of semi-spicy green sauce, some tangy red stuff that looks like barbecue sauce but is not and a bunch of raw onions in orange sauce. I have no idea what these are called, but they're all very interesting/ tasty and I'm definitely going to ask my fellow Catbirdette and India Expert Leah what they are when I see her.

Also when I walked in to get my order the walls of the restaurant were covered in these huge bedazzled paintings of Indian couples in very suggestive positions... I loved it.

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: Fashionably Late?!?

Between Fashion's Night Out (thanks to everyone who came and drank champagne with me!) and getting THE FLUUUUUU (I could only eat tea and broth for a whole week! Something I wouldn't even dream of wishing on my worst ex-boyfriend) I have really fallen behind on my posts :-( Sorry guys!! But I'm back! And like any classy lady recovering from a serious illness and an overdose of Netflix (mainly just Buffy and Breaking Bad) I'm vegging out on biscuits and fried chicken at Pies N' Thighs.

Our good friend and Honorary Bird* Dez works there and said I should get the Fried Chicken Box with a salad as the side soooo that's what I got! And that's what I ate! And it was delicious! The End. 

Just kidding! The salad had a lot of radish in it which I was really happy about and the chicken was just really really good fried chicken. Better than some other places that claim to have the best fried chicken in Brooklyn so, yeah I'd recommend getting it as soon as humanly possible.

And as for my little asterisk* upstairs... Keep an eye out for Coco's new post on Honorary Birds- the talented memory ring-clad people we love and where to find them!!!

See you next week, I promise!

<3 Ash

P.s. Here's something to remember me by ;-)

Lunch Lady: You're So Stupid, Rose.

I met The Lodge one beautiful Sunday afternoon in the summer of 2007. The treestump seats around the cross-section table, the antler chandeliers, the Bloody Marys in mason jars, the handsome men and women, the wing nights, the cocktails, the local wines and microbrews- it was only the first date, but I fell pretty hard for this place and have been going back ever since.

This time around I tried the Iceberg Wedge Salad. Basically just a head of lettuce cut in half with blue cheese, bacon and cherry tomatoes. I added the chicken and avocado :-) I was really wondering why this particular salad has been popping up everywhere, maybe I'm late on it and am just realizing this but it's seriously all over the place. I guess it was a huge thing in the 60's and 70's before people got all caught up in "designer greens" and forgot how awesome something so simple can be. Yeah sure it basically does nothing for your body, but whatever- it's delicious and people are catching on. Or people caught on and I'm catching up. Either way I'm satisfied and nothing makes you feel more adult than eating a salad with a fork and knife so even if I never pronounce endive the right way I can still hold my knife properly and be a grown up.

Plus the name Iceberg Wedge just reminds me of Titanic and who doesn't like a little trip down memory lane during lunchtime?

;-)

<3 Ash

Lunch Lady: Get Weird

E-Manwich

INGREDIENTS-

Sriracha

Crunchy Peanut Butter

Wheat Bread

Spicy Pickles

Butter

PREPARE-

slice the pickles longways

get a butter knife

take out 2 slices of bread... or more if you're making like a triple decker but then you're definitely going to need milk- and in that case add milk (soy milk if you're lactose intolerant/vegan plus you'll have to leave out the butter as well) to the ingredients list above ^^^

ASSEMBLE-

butter one side of each slice of bread

peanut butter one side of each slice of bread (the opposite side :-)

add Sriracha to the Peanut Butter sides (no you cannot use any other hot sauce)

add a generous helping of pickle slices to one piece of bread

slap them together

COOK-

put in a frying pan or on a grill or a George Foreman (in this case you don't need butter but I don't know anyone aside from my mom who still has one of those)

like three minutes on each side? 

P.S.-

maybe add a side of goldfish

ENJOY!

**thanks to Eric for teaching me about the best sandwich in the world :-)

Lunch Lady: News Flash!

Uuummm... Leon's Burger Hut is open today!!! So obviously I had to move this post up the ladder because this is the best Monday of my tiny life. I have been walking past this place for years and have never ever ever seen the gates up. I've even researched it and it turns out that the sighting is rare for everyone not just the chronically unlucky. How they can afford to be so lackadaisical about their business hours is beyond me but I have never been so excited to sit in a dark mini diner getting hot boxed by the thick smoke of "French Frenchy Fries."

The walls are splattered in paint and covered in black and orange tiger stripes with lion figurines sprinkled everywhere. The woman behind the counter was very polite and must be some kind of clairvoyant because I asked for one side salad and got two orders of fries instead. High five, Abuelita- you knew just what I wanted. Who cares if it's 11:50am and I was actually just on my way to get a Soy Latte?!

So I got the "Cheeseburger Leon Super Deluxe" which is waaaay less exciting than it sounds but I mean it's $4.75 what do you expect? It's a beef patty on a sesame bun with lettuce, tomato, american cheese & a butter pickle. And it tastes like a beef patty on a sesame bun with lettuce, tomato, american cheese, a butter pickle and magic. I came very close to getting the "Sweet Baby Shoes! Soup of the Day" but to be honest it scared me a little bit and I wanted to just stick to something predictable.

This place is cheap and awesome and I am so so happy that I'm the kind of putz that pays upwards of 5 bucks for a foofy cup of coffee because if I wasn't then I never would have stumbled into one of the most amazing places I've ever been to in my entire life.

GO HERE before the gate rolls down and you're forced to light a candle and pray for them to open again!! Seriously. Also! They have Veggie Burgers so all you Little Foots* have no excuse.

<3 Ash

*Land Before Time- duh.

Lunch Lady: Renovation! :-)

We're gettin' all gussied up!!! We're shellacking our nails, painting our lips and slapping on a fresh pair of underthings just for you ;-) We even kissed the sign we made just so you won't miss us too bad while we're busy getting beautiful. BUT a girl's still gotta eat- and everyone knows how shamelessly obsessed every Catbird is with La Nonna. We even had a not-so-mild panic attack when we realized they were going to be closed for our outing at Gutter the other day. Anyway, we were resourceful and we survived I guess but it was a serious struggle.

So, this week while we're in the midst of polishing and tagging and dodging drills, the amazing pizza place down the block is going to get a lot of business (we are never taking them for granted ever ever ever again) from the lovely ladies spending their days at 219 Bedford.

To ring in the renovation madness we all decided the best way to go was the ever popular Pizza Rustica. You've probably seen it plastered all over our Instagram but we just can't help ourselves <3  It's their classic crust with Fresh Tomato, Fresh Mozzarella & Really Fresh Arugula. It's a good choice if you want something more than just plain pizza but nothing too crazy.

And as with any good place to eat/drink in Williamsburg you'll probably have to wait in line behind a handful of Birdettes, but not to worry- we don't bite :-)


<3 Ash

How We Wear It: Ash

With too many positive things to say on the subject, I tried to keep it brief to avoid a novel! Ash and I became birds the same week last May and pretty much since day one I've had a lil' lady bird crush on her! How could you not?! She makes a mean playlist, a delicious peanut butter, pickle and hot sauce sandwich, rocks the best hand-me-downs from her mama, knows all the best places to eat in the hood, has hair to die for, can make anything more adorable with the cutest handmade signs, she owns her own tattoo machine annnnd! she knows just the right way to build a ring stack!!

Everyday Ash wears her stacks across her K I N S finger tattoos, the cutest nickname between her and her sister, and knuckle rings all the way across.

Each finger rings listed from top to bottom.

Pinky Finger: Catbird Heart Ring, Yellow Gold + matte, $92; Gifted J. Lingnau ring; Catbird First Knuckle Ring prototype in 22k yellow gold; Catbird First Knuckle Ring, $64.

Ring Finger: Vintage Ring; Catbird First Knuckle Ring, $64.

Middle Finger: Catbird Tiny Chain Ring, $64; One of a kind tear drop tiger's eye. Catbird Teardrop Ring available in Coral, Opal and Topaz, $188; Catbird Heart Ring, Rose Gold, $92; Jezebel. Evil Eye Ring, $288; Yayoi Forest Crossing Ring, $326.

Index Finger: Threadbare, $44; Gifted Bittersweets birdette a ring.

xx coco.

Lunch Lady: In Memoriam Theodore Donald Karabotsos

As Leigh so eloquently put it..."Catbird is hungover."

After a night of whiskey on the rocks with lime, SIXTEEN of the hottest babes I know, waaayyy too many gutterballs and this! My body is not very happy with me. So to make it up to myself I decided to take the advice of our lovely friends at When Babies Blog and place my first order with Champs over on Ainslie St.

I got the Oven-Roasted Chili Cheese Fries and the Mexican Raw Kale Salad. The fries (of course) went first. They're steak cut and covered in their "award-winning" chili and cheese. We devoured them.

I've been wanting to learn how to make vegan chili (by the way everything here is Vegan :-) for the longest and now I think it's time to see if I can bribe someone at Champs to atleast point me in the right direction, because these were STUPID delicious!!!!! I have never ever had such amazing vegan chili before. Just way way too good. And you don't have to feel that bad ordering them because they're oven-roasted ;-) Still fries though, but whatever, you already know my thoughts on the subject.

Onto the salad... It had cherry tomatos, sweet corn, black beans, avocado, raw kale, quinoa and a chipotle vinaigrette dressing. Now, unfortunately I am kind of an idiot when it comes to healthy food. Aside from vegetables, fruit and water I have no idea what I'm supposed to be ingesting to keep my brain from turning to mush in 60 years. And today I was pleasantly surprised to find out that I absolutely love Quinoa! I've never seen it in a salad before and the last time I tried it it was godawful and tasted like soap- which I hear can happen if you don't rinse the seeds properly. So, thanks to the ladies and gentlemen of Champs for knowing what they're doing. I thoroughly enjoyed every bit of it.

ALSO, the people that work there are pretty dope and let us try one of their awesome Peanut Butter Bars! They must have known I was up until midnight sucking down drinks with the rest of the birds because this was exactly what I needed. That and the two coffees pictured above. One iced, one hot, just to keep me alive.

Happy Wednesday, Sugarbabies

<3 Ash